Give me peace. . .

Surprise

Fri, 28 May 2004 05:45:12 GMT

nevermind

well

Thu, 20 May 2004 17:15:56 GMT

I'm almost done with my demo with my buddy. Going to the studio next week, If all goes well our cds will be passed out at pmx. I've a lot more confidence with people I know than with strangers I can't trust.

My dream

Wed, 19 May 2004 18:24:28 GMT

I'm Waiting at night, at a bus stop with people i dont know.
The people are talking about how there are ghosts around this place.
Suddenly a school bus comes around the corner on the wrong side
of the road. I can smell death as it speeds past us.
We pitch a tent. I can hear things outside but for some reason I fall asleep.
Everyone wakes up the next night. The tent has been put inside a house.
We open the tent and step outside. A man is waiting for us.
We are told to form a circle and that we are now being judged
for what we will have for eternity. Everyone tries to make the others
look worse than themselves and eventually everyone is given a sentence.
I try to escape the house. I climb a flight of stairs where I am met
by a black cat. The cat bites me, but he has not teeth, I pass out anyways
and end up back at the tent where I started. I keep meeting the cat
in different places of the house.

My dream

Wed, 19 May 2004 18:23:50 GMT

almost done!

Tue, 11 May 2004 05:14:04 GMT

I'm almost done with a 5 track demo and a PR kit with my buddy :) hope it all goes as planned!

Also

Sun, 09 May 2004 18:21:44 GMT

When I was 16-18 i had been hospitolized 6 times. I know what it's like to be sick. Paul told me the other day that he ate poison on accident, and I imediatly called my mom at the Emergency Room to find out if he was gonna be okay, and what should he do. I was NOT a bad guy to you paul. And you called me inconsiderate? Just think before you do anything irrational like that. I was willing to do anything for you and hideko, But like I said at the beginning, "I don't put up with a lot of shit"

Yeah

Sun, 09 May 2004 18:20:09 GMT

Paul is mad at me koz i said my problems are worse than his. My problems include people who use guns and cocain and physical and mental abuse.
And all I hear from you, hideko, and paul, is "oh we are going to california to see a band play." hideko is getting a new mixer board, hideko is going to Japan. Yeah you guys have it reallll bad. Paul was frustrated with his computer so i thought it would be the best oportunity to think what that spoiled brat really thinks. You two are the ones who need help, not me. My problems involve the people I'm surrounded by. And I need to get away from them somehow. Thats hard to do in the city, get your own place, I'd have to have 2 jobs and I'd never get my education finished. I thought we could make it as a band, but I was sick of hearing "next month" "next month." There really wasn't anything was there? You don't care about me, or appreciate what I was doing for the band, so why the hell should I stay?

oh please.

Sun, 09 May 2004 04:42:05 GMT

O-Dai knew me for about 1 week in person, and I barely even spoke. Hideko, you don't know what you are talking about so shut up. and god damnit, i don't want to talk to you anymore. this is my journal, i'll say what i want, if you dont like what you read then stop reading it

Moving on

Fri, 07 May 2004 02:24:14 GMT

I've joined a band with people who are on the same level of maturity as me. As usual my hopes are high, but this time it's with true friends, people who won't fuck me over if they see an opportunity for their own benefit. In the meantime I'm going to be working at the hospitol doing medical transcription. The thing that the others don't understand is that when someone has the same dream as you and you agree to work together, you are to do everything in your power to make it work. Without that kind of understanding there is much to be lost, as many of whom read this will come to understand in time. I can't say that i had fun working for people who don't appreciate me. who would? I'm not really hurt, but i do feel as if i've lost much time trusting people who simply can't be trusted, and I've got bigger issues to deal with.

Wed, 05 May 2004 03:00:35 GMT

::censored:

Mon, 03 May 2004 20:23:08 GMT

I am in such a weird mood :P
Gonna work some more on my songs soon. Hope hideko likes my new stuff!

heheh

Mon, 03 May 2004 01:58:56 GMT

hheeheehee

Somewat poetic :S

Sun, 02 May 2004 02:16:04 GMT

- - - Smother - - -

Now I can’t sleep. I still feel you breathe.
I hate you more than anything.
You Homo-cidal obscurity.
Waving your gun like the prick you need.

Needles punctures puts you in
The Superconscious state your in.
Stumble to my room again
trying to prove your argument.

Smother the hate in me.
What is wrong with me.
Someone sever me.
Smother the hate in me.

Paint my face with your disease.
So enticed to see you bleed.
I hope this makes you feel like me.
Forever filling holes in me.

Crush the hours of your dejection
With the “one true God” that you impose
Mother can’t you take rejection?
She shot it in her veins!.
She shot it in her veins!

Smother the hate in me.
What is wrong with me.
Someone sever me.
Smother the hate in me.

Wierd :S

Wed, 28 Apr 2004 23:22:42 GMT

Rikku sent me some messeges, but i dont get them on my pc, instead they show up on my brothers computer. everyting i've talked about has been on my fathers Pc :S

god i hope i didn't say anything i'll regret haha.

YAYYY!

Wed, 28 Apr 2004 04:42:16 GMT

My neighbor had some strings for my guitar :D :D :D :D

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tue, 27 Apr 2004 21:32:27 GMT

i was writing a song at 230 bpm and i broke my D string. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK! . . .. FUCK!

. . .

Tue, 27 Apr 2004 01:11:57 GMT

I can't tell you how much i need to get out of here as soon as possible. Today there was a huge argument at sonjas house, i wasn't there, but my mom came back beat up and crying like a baby. So i went to sonja's house and knocked on the door and told her that if she ever comes near my mom again, there's going to be big trouble. So i won't be surpised if the police come to question me. Sonja was smacked on coke again, same story, but the bitch told the cops that my mom is a drug trafficer. I swear to god, i'm gonna end up beating the shit out of sonja, i HATE her.

Grrr. . . .

Mon, 26 Apr 2004 02:00:57 GMT

My father said that hes gonna shut off the net until i get a job and he won't support me in any way about going to Georgia. I knew this would eventually happen. . . so if i'm gone for a long time thats why. hope you remember my phone number Hideko. My mother also changed her mind now, she was supportive before but now she thinks it's stupid. whatever, it's not like i was going anywhere soon.

Feeling strange

Sat, 24 Apr 2004 23:32:57 GMT

Well I'm waiting for hideko so we can work hard together on this project. i know we'll do great. :)

And the evening arrives. .

Sat, 24 Apr 2004 00:58:36 GMT

God why do i always get manic at night :S. Now i'm all depressed, fuck it...

AHH IM SO HYPER!

Fri, 23 Apr 2004 23:04:50 GMT

i feel happy! and hyper and i feel like smashing something just because its fun. :D oooh my old motherboard! BRB *goes to find a hammer*

. . .

Fri, 23 Apr 2004 19:52:58 GMT

I got my computer back up and running, i have to install a zillion VST plugins to make my songs work again. I'm done with my classes now. Just waiting on hideko. I hope i get to georgia soon, my father is being such a pain in the ass its making me crazy.

:(

Wed, 21 Apr 2004 11:46:39 GMT

My cousin slipped in to a coma last night, I'm pretty stressed out right now.

:'(

Mon, 19 Apr 2004 02:42:25 GMT

Well my motherboard on my pc died. so i cant use my computer until i get a new one. It's gonna cost 150 dollars. if i payed 300 i could get a whole new fucking computer. GRRRRRRRRRR. I'm so pissed off!

Yeah im like, NC-17 or something :S

Fri, 09 Apr 2004 02:53:47 GMT

Your Journal Is Rated NC-17

Journal? More like a sex tell all!

For you, no naughty detail is too small.

You'd never think of using an LJ Cut

Even for pic of a dildo up your butt

What's Your Journal Rated?

More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva

OK.. WHAT THE HELL?! I''m not a pervert at all. what is this crappp. Hideko where do you find these tests? :S